A is for August...

Usually January is by far the toughest month for me...what with the cold weather, ice, snow, and the winter blues that usually set in.  
Ever since last year, another month has recently tried to take top honors of the worst month of the year for me and that's August.  
No it's not because it's the beginning of the end of summer.  It's not because it's blazing hot outside everyday.  It's simply because the rows and rows of wonderfully smelling new school supplies are a constant reminder of the job and profession that I love and miss.  
Don't get me wrong, I absolutely LOVE being a stay-at-home mom.  And who wouldn't when you get to see this face everyday?

It's that August was always my favorite time of the year when I was teaching.  Most teachers hate setting up their classroom, I LOVE it!  The plastic bins just waiting for my label maker, the smell of a clean room, new floor plans that I've drawn on a sketch pad on ways to "maximize space" and make my room "more efficient"...
I loved getting 3 Really Good Stuff magazines in the mail and dreaming about all the wonderful things I can add to my classroom.   I still get them, but they go straight to the trash...I just can't look at them without getting excited about setting up a classroom I don't have.  
And it's not so much just the setting up of my classroom...it's the anticipation of the new year.  Who's going to be in my class?  What new lesson plans am I going to implement?  How can I teach this standard better?  What challenges am I going to have?  I miss those things.  And now August just seems like another month in the calendar...
I know that as soon as school gets into the swing of things and I see the stress on my teacher friend's faces, and it gets closer to state testing time, it'll be easier not to miss teaching.  But for now, it's hard and I miss it. 
I know I made the right decision and I love spending my days with my little girl.  I am blessed and thankful to be able to be with her each day.  
And to ease the sadness, I sometimes, just sometimes go down the school supply isle, take in the smell of new school supplies, and buy a little, even though we won't need them for 5 more years.